1 in 3 women affected by this it maybe but I took enough for 9 of us, does that make me reckless / feckless? Or was it just bad luck? Number One: aged 19, at the end of my first year at uni, bang on 30 years ago now. It was in a new relationship and the result of a failed condom AND morning after pill, one determined bundle of cells! Accessing the clinic involved a 90 minute train journey and an overnight stay from my relatively remote northern home town. It was the right decision for both of us then and now and something we've very recently spoken about too as we're still in touch. He's also thought about it from time to time over the year so mens voices shouldn't be silent in these conversations. Number Two: fast forward to age 25, a year into another relationship, this was a much tougher decision and there was probably an element of we're too young, just starting out on our careers etc. Was another contraceptive failure (I was not medically able to use hormonal contraceptives by this point). Number Three: less than 5 months after the second one, we'd decided I should have a copper IUD fitted but there were limited places who would fit an IUD into someone who'd not had a full term pregnancy. By the time that came around, yep, pregnant again and by 10 weeks. This termination seriously emotionally affected me for months, perhaps years afterwards, the relationship limped on for another 5 years but am sure it's downfall was set in motion having 2 terminations. I've since gone on to have 2 children but those first 3 pregnancies are regularly on my mind and in all the close female friends I've had over the years, not a single other one has ever spoken about being one of the 1 in 3 and this stigma must end.