It was just over 30 years ago when I had my abortion. I was 20 years old and had been with my boyfriend for about a year when I fell pregnant due to contraception failure. I was in no position to have a child, I had a low paid job and my boyfriend was totally irresponsible with drug and alcohol dependancies and couldnt hold a job for more than a couple of weeks at a time. I lived at home and my mum had very victorian attitudes towards sex. She strongly believed, in her words, 'Only sluts have sex before marriage'. I am sure she knew I was having sex but she chose to ignore it. The idea of telling her I was pregnant was an absolute no no. That aside, that wasn't the reason I had my abortion. Thankfully at the time regardless of my own immaturity, I had enough presence of mind to know that having a baby with this man at that point of my life would be a terrible decision with far reaching and unimaginable repercussions, not just for myself and the father but for our families and more importantly, the baby that would have been brought into the world. I couldn't make good decisions for myself at that point in my life, never mind a baby. Also the father had drug and alcohol issues which still persist to this day, he would not have been any kind of presence in the child's life. The father struggled with self esteem which he always felt was a result of himself being adopted, he never got over the feeling that there must have been something wrong with him for him to be abandoned by his birth mum. We managed somehow to scrape together money for me to have my abortion at a private clinic. On the day when we arrived at the clinic there were 'pro-lifers' outside harassing women entering the premises. I remember feeling incensed that they thought it was OK to do this to women, most of whom had probably agonised over their decision and would have been feeling very vulnerable. That wasn't true of myself that day, I knew the moment I found out that I didn't want the baby, the time wasn't right for me. Inside the clinic there was almost a sense camaraderie, there were women from all over the country with their own stories. A couple of the women there had travelled from Ireland and would be travelling back the next day. This horrified me that women in Ireland didn't have the same access to abortion as we had, and not only had to deal with having an abortion, but only the lucky few who could afford to travel to England were able to receive the same care as me. The feeling of relief and happiness I had after the procedure was over was enormous, it was so great I can still almost feel it today. I felt 'reborn', like I had another chance at life. Soon after I ended the relationship and moved on. Today I am a mother to an amazing 14 year old, I am happily married, live in an affluent area and have a lovely house. I am a much better parent today than I would have been at 20. I wouldn't be where I am today had I not had my abortion, I always look at that as being my sliding doors moment.