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  • googie7
  • Apr 28, 2020
  • 2 min read

I was 21 when I fell pregnant .. I was in a relationship with someone I loved and after a few years of being a bit lost had got accepted into uni .. I was due to start in about five months .. after a night out .. a few of us got thrown out of a taxi home for not having any money (fair enough…) so we went back to one of our (parents) houses for an after party .. three of us .. who were friends .. me and two guys … I remember falling asleep in the corner of the sofa … when I woke up .. I was on the bed .. and one of them was beginning to have sex with me .. I was still so out of it I only woke up to what was happening when he said something that made me think of my boyfriend .. I got morning after pill and tried to pretend it hadn’t happened .. but it didn’t work .. when i realised I was pregnant I went into autopilot .. again I wanted to pretend it wasn’t happening .. I couldn’t handle it and just wanted everything to be okay .. I told one friend who came with me … the guilt of hiding it from my boyfriend ate away at me .. I developed an eating disorder .. and became obsessive about working hard to be ‘a good person’ .. after about three years I couldn’t keep it to myself any longer .. I had to tell him .. he was as good as could be expected .. but over time it ruined us … I feel like I did what I had to do .. but I still wish none of it happened ..

 
 
 

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